If your midlife hair in its natural state looks like you just finished a Jeep ride in a hurricane, with a chimpanzee giving you a makeover… I got you.

My midlife hair is longer than I’ve ever worn it. Growing up, all the married women I knew had short hair. I thought that was the rule.

So, weeks after I got married at 22, I cut it short. Remember that movie Single White Female? 

Single White Female

Credit IMDB

Bridget Fonda had amazing hair! Mine didn’t quite turn out like that. It turned out like this.

Midlife Hair

Current Hubby hung the snapshot on the fridge. He says I looked like a realtor. He’s not wrong. 

But twenty years with basically that style was enough. At 42, I started letting it grow. That’s when I discovered, I have very badly behaved hair. 

In middle school, it was that length, but it wasn’t that nuts. Of course, those were the days of Farrah Fawcett wings, Prell, Gee Your Hair Smells Terrific (in my Christmas stocking), and Aquanet.

Hair Changes with Age

Turns out, your hair changes a lot as you age. Not just turning gray either. I once had a stylist tell me my hair was actually more like two or three people’s hair all on one head (though not the volume, dammit). Wavy on the sides. Kinky in the back, and confused in the front. Great.

Also, for some reason, when I hit about 44, the hair on my nape basically went on strike. It wouldn’t grow. It looked like an undercut… but it wasn’t. 

Massive doses of Biotin seem to be helping with that – I’ll write about supplements another time. 

I even got extensions a while back. PHEW, were they expensive. The stylist said they’d last a good four months before she’d need to take them out, condition them, and put them back in. Turned out, I could get maybe two months. Seriously. I couldn’t justify spending thousands of dollars a year for someone else’s hair. Plus, extensions are straight. My hair types do not include straight.

Well, unless I get a blow-out. Then it’s straight and silky. Unless I go outside. In Alabama, it’s always humid.

Midlife HairBut at home, my options were:

  1. Leave it wild, hope I don’t get mistaken for a tumbleweed.
  2. Throw it into a pony. Eh.
  3. Braid it. Pretty thin braid, so not my favorite.
  4. Blow it out, straighten it, and DO NOT GO OUTSIDE. Not so practical.

Midlife Hair

Oh, or I could cut it short again. Sigh.

Then, through work at Capitalism.com, I heard about this brush one of the community members had invented. I’m sure it’s supposed to be for little kids, so they don’t cry when you brush their hair. It’s at CraveNaturals.com – I’m not an affiliate or anything… I just think every single person with hair that’s really hard to handle should know about it. Kristen there is a huge supporter of Wigs for Kids. She donates a portion of profits to help kids who’ve lost their hair as they deal with some serious health concerns.


But THIS. This is the brush I have been wishing for forever. It’s amazing in the shower. It’s even better when it’s time to dry my hair. It doesn’t pull, and that’s the best thing ever for thin, wonky, woolly hair. (Hubby even likes it enough to remember to bring it into our shower.) It feels so nice that I brush way more often than before.


Then, like a quarter dropper of this Argan Oil from Fox Brim Naturals (again, not an affiliate link). Don’t use too much or you’ll go from flyaway crazy to greasy. I’ve tried salvaging over usage with dry shampoo. Don’t bother. Just be careful not to overdo it in the first place.


I’m also using this stuff called Third Wheel from Hair Kandy. Some call it “Jesus Juice” and you know… that’s a pretty good name for it. Just spray some on before you start drying – and again if you’re going to straighten. OK, even a third time if you live somewhere where the weather seems to plot against a good hair day.

Midlife Hair

Anyhow, midlife hair is nothing if not in constant flux. There are still days shaving it all off sound like a perfectly reasonable solution. But those days are becoming less frequent.

How about Your Midlife Hair?

What changes have you seen in how your hair grows?

Is there anything you wish someone would invent to solve your worst midlife hair problems?

What have you tried, and why didn’t it work?

Any products do you love?

Let me know in the comments!